Dating an Architect (10 Ice-Breaker Questions)

The only things you know about your upcoming date is that they are an architect, their name, and where you are meeting.

First, remember that architects are people first and architecture is their career – all the typical questions you ask on a date night with a new person work.

Second, the purpose of asking questions is to get the conversational ball rolling so you can find out about your date and they can find out about you.

Don’t march relentlessly through your list of questions. Throw a question out there, listen to the answer, and then use the response to wander down a few conversational pathways.

It does not matter if you don’t ask all the questions on your list – the point is to have fun, not to run an interrogation or interview session.

Finally, be prepared to answer your date’s questions. If you ask them what their favorite book of all time is, they will probably ask about yours. Don’t ask a question that you wouldn’t want to answer.

It takes two people to keep a conversation flowing, so what are the best questions to ask an architect on a date?

questions to ask an architect on a date

#1 Why Architecture?

It is the most obvious question to ask an architect on a date. Why did your date choose the hard road of architecture when they could have done something else?

Plus, you are not going to blindside your date with a difficult question because they have been answering this question to get into university and at every job interview.

It is not the most imaginative question in the world, but it will get the conversational ball rolling.

#2 What Are You Working on Now?

Unless your architect date works for the military, this is a pleasant invitation to invite your architect to talk about themselves.

Your date will probably not go into too much detail because they will be wary of overloading you with shop talk. Alternatively, they might deluge you with too much detail – it depends on their personality.

The way your date answers this question tells you a lot about their approach to conversation and their work.

The answer may surprise you because architects work in an astonishing range of places like movie sets and other exciting alternative fields besides architecture, and they design more than houses.

#3 What is Your Favorite Movie?

Architects watch films too, and some architects work in the film industry or are interested in the technical details of how 3D rendering produces the film set.

Maybe, your architect date enjoys films for entertainment, and maybe they have a professional interest. You won’t know until you ask.

Remember to ask a follow-up question – why that movie?

Plus, be prepared to respond with your favorite movies and why they make your top ten.

There is no point in pretending to be interested in films because of their architectural appeal (unless genuine) because a date is a “getting to know the real you” process.

#4 What is Your Favorite City?

Your date is an architect, and they are going to have an opinion on what city is the best from an architectural point of view. Some architects are more interested in the urban environment than individual buildings and others in green spaces.

Your date’s reasons for picking a city as their favorite will tell you a lot about them.

#5 What is Your Dream Project?

Nothing gives you an insight into character as much as a person’s dreams. As one of the questions to ask an architect on a date, this one reveals ambition.

Perhaps your architect date dreams of building a comfortable family home, the first building on the moon, or any other fantastic project.

#6 What Does a Day in Your Life as an Architect Look Like?

This question is an invitation to talk about early mornings, late nights, site visits, and all the other parts of being an architect.

It will also give you an idea about what type of architect you are dating and hopefully spark some follow-up questions.

#7 What is Your Ideal Vacation?

It is better to ask about ideals rather than your date’s last vacation. Their previous holiday may not be their favorite memory, and perhaps they were too busy last year.

A question about ideals is more exploratory and allows you to see what they enjoy.

The ideal vacation for your architect date can be anything from relaxing on a beach to a cultural sightseeing trip to fill an album with pictures of potential design ideas. You won’t know until you ask.

Listen to the answer carefully, is your date’s ideal vacation something you will enjoy or your worst nightmare?

#8 If You Could Live in a Different Time, When Would It Be?

Another fantasy question – perhaps your architect is a fan of the Renaissance or the Greeks. Or maybe they will surprise you with their thoughts on the golden age with a desire to leap ahead in time to a future world.

It is a fun question with no wrong answer, but remember you need to prepare yourself to express your opinion of the best period for you.

#9 Who is the Person You Most Want to Meet?

It is up to you whether this question covers historical figures, but this question reveals character. People aspire to be like the people they admire but be careful about reading too much into the answer.

Your architecture date may want to meet Genghis Kahn because of an interest in history rather than a desire to build an empire.

#10 If You Could Change One Thing, What Would It Be?

Another character question with no real answer – it may elicit a personal story, or your architect date may talk about wanting to make the world a better place.

Most people have something in their lives that they would change if they could, but it is not a big deal if your date does not have an answer. This question, like all the others, is about getting a conversation started.

If you want to avoid awkward silence, be prepared to fill the gap with your own answer to this question.


You may not need any questions to ask an architect on a date because the conversation may just flow between the two of you.

These top ten questions are something you can hold in reserve for moments when you need to get the conversation started. One or two that appeal to you are the only ones you need as a potential ice breaker.

Relax and have fun on your date!